Ponytail dude in Tool t-shirt is cornered by vampires! This is kinda 1992, eh?
Unfortunately the vampire attack scenes are a little confusing and inelegant. Dogpile!
Next fight scene. Let's punctuate it by cutting to an expressionless bartender!
Hm. A little dark in here. I think I see some roundhousing.
There's plenty of lovingly shot footage of motor vehicles.
To be blunt, at 81 minutes and without a lick of technical expertise, this thing is way too long. We had ten minutes of Rip Torn style huge laughs and then seventy minutes where I realized there was no story, just a series of crappy fight scenes and Oh God, are they just walking down a hallway this entire scene?! At first my gut reaction was a kind of misplaced pathos: props to writer/director/star Adam Minarovich for getting some friends together and making it all happen, I thought.
Minarovich has not given up -- he's nudged himself into the industry, and was most recently seen in the AMC series Walking Dead playing Ed Peletier, an abusive, sexist-pig husband. Not a bad trajectory for a DIY route. But after a few days, my reaction has changed. This is a terrible movie. Minarovich is clearly the only one onscreen taking this movie seriously - way too seriously. He's filmed from worm's eye view in heroic shots and gets all the "good" lines (including snapping at his Little Person sidekick pejoratively "Close your little mouth" - yech). Minarovich appears motivated not to tell a unique story or contribute something to film. He just wants to be part of the industry, which is what he has achieved - by making the film equivalent of Cheetos.
Minarovich has not given up -- he's nudged himself into the industry, and was most recently seen in the AMC series Walking Dead playing Ed Peletier, an abusive, sexist-pig husband. Not a bad trajectory for a DIY route. But after a few days, my reaction has changed. This is a terrible movie. Minarovich is clearly the only one onscreen taking this movie seriously - way too seriously. He's filmed from worm's eye view in heroic shots and gets all the "good" lines (including snapping at his Little Person sidekick pejoratively "Close your little mouth" - yech). Minarovich appears motivated not to tell a unique story or contribute something to film. He just wants to be part of the industry, which is what he has achieved - by making the film equivalent of Cheetos.
There is something missing from this trailer: oh yeah - the part where a midget punches another dude in the crotch.
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